Loving One Another

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This I command you, to love one another. John 15:17

John puts love at the center of the Christian life. Jesus, according to John, gave us but one command: that we would love one another. John told us that God so loved the world he gave his only begotten son that whoever would believe in him would have everlasting life. (John 3:16) Those who abide in love abide in God. Indeed, God is love. (1 John 4:16) But when we pay closer attention to Jesus’ command to love we may discover something that troubles us. Jesus, according to John, commands us to love one another. “This way people will know that you are my disciples, that you love one another.” (John 13:35) Where is the command to love everyone? Where is the command to love our neighbors?

Luke shows Jesus telling the parable of the Good Samaritan, where we learn that a “neighbor” for Jesus is anyone to whom we show mercy. Matthew shows Jesus telling us to love our enemies, because in doing so we imitate our Father in heaven who makes the rain to fall on the just and the unjust alike. We know Jesus taught this inclusive love. So why does John not show this side of Jesus? 

Every gospel writer wants to emphasize some aspect of Jesus they knew and experienced. That’s why we have four gospels instead of one. And that’s why past attempts to abridge the gospels into one document were rejected. The Church has always had a sense that Matthew has something true to tell us that Mark might not, or Mark has something true to tell us that Luke might not. Matthew wishes to emphasize Jesus the new Moses, who brings about a new covenant and law. Luke, the gentile physician, emphasizes Jesus forming a new community of gentiles and outcasts. And John has his own emphases. 

Nowhere in John’s Gospel does Jesus say we should not love someone. He merely tells us to love one another. I think the reason John puts so much emphasis on loving one another is that it is hard enough to love each other. It is easy to love in the abstract. It’s easy to say love is a good thing, or that we should love everyone, or we should show love to this or that sort of person. It’s a whole lot harder to love Tom, Dick, or Jane. There are no stakes to loving our neighbor in the abstract. But we know Tom, Dick, or Jane warts and all. We know their annoying laugh or verbal tics. We know their tendency to tell tales out of school, or their boastfulness. We know they can be harsh, or they can refuse to stand up for themselves. But Jesus tells us to love one another. So Jesus tells us to love Tom, Dick, or Jane. And loving the people we know, can be a lot harder than loving those we don’t.

Jesus knows this about us. That’s why he emphasizes first that we love one another. Loving one another is where the rubber meets the road. If we can’t show love to one another, how are we to show love to the stranger? After all, if I do it right the stranger will become a neighbor. I had that happen once. I recall helping a panhandler when he was a stranger, and feeling quite good about it. But he quickly became my neighbor. Once he became a neighbor to me, and I learned his real name, I saw how he could be deceitful. If I can say so, I really didn’t like him. But he had become my neighbor. And I knew I was called to love him. And the difficulty became recognizing what love looked like. The rubber had hit the road, I could no longer get by with the easy love of an empty gesture. I had a neighbor. 

So let us love one another. If we love one another, the world will know we are the disciples of Christ. Let’s focus on that simple yet difficult act. Not at the exclusion of others. Not because we are insular. But because loving one another prepares us to love others in turn. If we can love one another, we can love when it counts.